Sermon by Michelle - April 10, Feed My Sheep

Do you love me?

It is a simple question, and yet one fraught with much risk and danger. Small children ask it over and over, seeking the simple reassurance of love. As I write my sermon, my cat asks it, in her own way, butting her head up against my face, asking to be petted. But, as we get older, we stop asking. When we date, we know that the question carries danger - to be head over heels in love with someone, only to receive the reply that, no, the beloved does not feel the same way. Devastating. Heart breaking. So, we often stop asking.

But, today's scripture reminds us that we stop asking for another reason as well. We stop asking, because the answer has consequences. Loving someone compels action.

For Jesus, of course, the answer to the question, "Jesus, do you love me?" has played out in dramatic form in the last few weeks. For Jesus, the consequences of that love include dramatic proof that God loves us, by suffering for us. And then, by returning to the very people who caused him suffering. For Jesus, the consequences of that love mean forgiving those who hurt him. And in today's Gospel, they include loving Peter, the man who denied him. And so, Jesus asks him, Simon Peter, son of John, do you love me?

Peter's answer comes instantly, "You know that I love you." But it is not enough to just say it. Jesus specifically asks Peter to demonstrate it. "Feed my sheep." If you love me more than the other disciples, show that you can lead them. Share that love with others. Feed my sheep. And Peter hesitates.

So Jesus asks again, "Do you love me?" And again. Because love has consequences. Finally, Peter, perhaps feeling guilty for not having stood up for Jesus on Good Friday, perhaps just hoping that he could do something for Jesus, rather than letting others get the glory, replies with exasperation, "You know everything, you must know that I love you." And so Jesus spells it out for him - feed my sheep. Lead my church. Spread my love, but know that spreading love is radical and counter-cultural. You must be prepared to go wherever I tell you. And, though Peter didn't realize it, Jesus was hinting that he might die.

Were those thoughts running through Ananias's head, a few years later, when Jesus called him? Ananias, who loved the Lord, and thought he was doing God's will? Jesus doesn't bother to ask Ananias whether he loves him - Jesus knows. Otherwise, he would not have trusted Ananias with so crucial a task - find Saul, who had been persecuting Christians, and convert him to the faith. Ananias knew of Saul, probably feared that Saul would bind and torture him for his love of Jesus. Yet, when Jesus asked, he answered. He went out, and met the man Saul.

And what about Saul - who, incidentally, also thought he was doing God's will, by mistakenly persecuting the followers of Christ? Yes, it took Jesus blinding him and speaking to him directly, but he changed, and risked his own life to follow Jesus.

Today, I suspect most of us do not experience such clear directions in our lives. Jesus does not offer us breakfast, ask if we love him, and then tell us what to do. Perhaps some of us have seen a vision, like Ananias, or heard a voice, but even that is rare.

And yet, I believe many of us are responding to the call of Jesus. In our own ways. Using our own gifts. I know this, because I see it in the many ways in which people are following Jesus' commands: feed my sheep, with food and with the Word. Minister to those who are physically or spiritually blind. Baptize in my name. St. Paul's would not exist without the many people who minister in the name of Jesus.

How? You ask. I'll show you. I'm going to list the ministries that go on at St. Paul's, and ask that those involved in these ministries please stand.

Let's start with the worship ministers - those who literally follow Jesus's command to feed the sheep with word and sacrament. If you have ever read the scriptures or the prayers during the service, please stand. And remain standing. If you have ever served communion, please rise. If you are an acolyte, helping with the service. Those who serve on the altar guild, making sure our worship is beautiful. If you have served as an usher, leading people through worship. If you have served as a greeter, welcoming new people to the service. If you have offered your gift of music, to the glory of God, in the choir, or as a musician. And, if you have ever joined your voice to the throng of those singing a hymn. You all are part of the ministries of God, feeding the sheep, and St. Paul's would not be the same without you. Thank you. You may be seated.

Of course, we are also nourished through learning about God. If you have ever taught Sunday school, please stand. If you have helped in children's chapel. If you have led an adult forum, or contributed to the discussion at a Wednesday night program. If you have chaperoned a youth trip. If you have been a parent, a godparent, you have sponsored someone for baptism or confirmation, or even offered a word of God to someone who needed it. You have fed the sheep through your ministry, and St. Paul's would not be the same without you. Thank you.

Food brings fellowship. If you have ever volunteered at the donut table on Sunday, please stand. If you have brought an egg casserole for a parish brunch, or a dish for a parish dinner, please stand. If you have helped prepare a reception after a funeral at St. Paul's, please stand. If you have organized a gathering of parishioners for a meal, as part of supper club, Dickens Dames, Pickwick Boys, young adults, or any other group, please stand. If you have been part of a book club or other group, please stand. You have fed the sheep through your ministry, and St. Paul's would not be the same without you. Thank you.

But there are more. We feed the sheep who are not part of St. Paul's, through outreach. So, I ask you: if you have ever brought a meal to Shepherds' Heart, or the Severe Weather Shelter, please stand. If you have volunteered at a food pantry, or a clothing closet. If you have made a meatloaf at home to bring to a shelter. If you have given a can or box of food to the food pantry, or a toy or gift to a family in need at Christmas, or a coat or other item for our warm clothing drives. If you have contributed to Episcopal Relief and Development, or any other charity that assists the poor and those devastated by a disaster. You have fed the sheep through your service, and St. Paul's would not be the same without you. Thank you.

There are ministries of healing that go on at St. Paul's. If you are a Stephen Minister, please stand. If you are a licensed Eucharistic Visitor. If you have ever delivered altar flowers to someone who was shut in, or grieving, or to someone who was celebrating. If you have brought a casserole to someone just home from the hospital. If you have sent a card, or made a phone call to someone who was sick, or could use a little cheer. You have spiritually fed the sheep, and St. Paul's would not be the same without you. Thank you.

There are countless ministries that keep St. Paul's running. If you serve on our vestry, helping to make the decisions that affect life at St. Paul's, please, stand. If you volunteer with the administration - putting our worship bulletins together, making sure prayer cards are in the pews, or supplies are where they need to be, please stand. If you count the collection on Monday mornings. And if you contribute to St. Paul's, by pledging, please stand. St. Paul's would not be the same without you. Thank you.

All of these are ways in which we follow the call of Jesus, to feed the sheep.

But, before we pat ourselves on the back too much, there's something to remember. Jesus often calls when we are most comfortable. When we think we know exactly what we're doing. And that's when it can be hardest to heed the call.

Peter had gone back to fishing, back to the life he knew, an honorable profession he had learned from his father, when Jesus suddenly appeared on the beach. And Jesus told him to feed his sheep, to lead the church. In short, to do something completely different.

Saul had been successful, earning praise and promotion as a good and faithful Pharisee, when Jesus appeared to him. Times have changed, Saul, he said, you should learn something completely different from what you have known.

Ananias had been living a quiet life, serving God in the Christian community in Damascus, when Jesus appeared to him. I'm bringing you someone new, said Jesus, be brave, and meet him when he comes.

And, lest you think this only happens in the past, I will give a more recent example. A few years ago, I was happily preparing for graduation and ordination, looking for my first job after seminary, when my life was changed. And, no, I didn't see Jesus in a vision, nor was I struck blind until I obeyed. But, I had a sense that I needed to go to Pittsburgh, and help as my dad fought cancer. And the more I prayed about it, the more it seemed that this was where was called. Like Peter, Saul, or Ananias, I had no idea how things would turn out. But I left my life in New Haven, and came to Pittsburgh.

Perhaps you have a similar story. A time that you seemed to be doing everything you should, and yet, you had a sense that you were called to do something new, to use your gifts in ways you had never tried before.

We, as the community of St. Paul's, are in the midst of a similar story. In a few minutes, I will introduce the chairs of the rector search committee. They are at the beginning of a journey, listening for a call. Over the next few months, they will delve into the "normal" life of St. Paul's as far as they can, to learn about the many ways in which we are showing the love of Jesus, and how we can continue to nourish and feed the sheep here.

But, then they will ask more. They will ask what needs to change, as well as what needs to stay the same. They will ask us who we would like to be; and who we could be, with God's help. They may ask us to imagine different ways to do things, like Jesus asking the disciples to throw the net to the other side of the boat. But most of all, they will remind us - we have lots of fish, in terms of spiritual and material gifts to share. If we love Jesus, let us continue to use those gifts to feed Jesus' sheep.