Presence by Michelle

By now, many of you have heard that I was in a bicycle accident in early May. An “accident” caused by a cyclist who was looking at a cell phone instead of at the trail, where I was cycling.

I appreciate the concern and sympathy many of you have expressed. I also appreciate the confusion and amazement as people have learned that my accident was caused by someone who was looking at his cell phone as he was on the trail. “Texting and cycling,” as I have called it. “How is that even possible?” enquired one parishioner via Facebook. Well, clearly it’s not. But, it’s made me think a little about the kind of culture that leads people to do things like check their cell phones while on their bicycles.

First, a reality check: when I told my mother I had been in an accident with someone who was texting while cycling, she assumed it was “some young guy.” It wasn’t. He was middle aged; as I put it, somewhere between my age and hers. I don’t know much beyond that – he had passed me about a mile earlier on the trail, and I expected I would not encounter him again.

A few minutes later, I realized I could still see him ahead of me. In fact, I was gaining on him, as he slowed down and started to drift into the middle of the trail. I planned to pass him. I was thinking about how glad I had been to take a quick ride – squeezed in between a morning of

grocery shopping and a planned evening of cleaning to get ready for a visit from my mother the next day – Mother’s Day. Earlier, I had been thinking how this ride – out on my bicycle, in the sun, along the river – was probably the most relaxed I’d been in a while. But, to be honest, as I was passing the guy with the cell phone, I was probably thinking a little more about what I needed to be doing next. Cleaning the apartment. Making preparations for Mother’s Day dinner. And so on.

The fact is, neither of us was entirely present on the trail that afternoon. Or, as the Dutch phrase it, “we weren’t there with our thoughts.”

Last year, I went to a CREDO clergy wellness conference. One of the faculty members emphasized the importance of “mindfulness,” or “presence,” the idea that when we do something, we should pay attention to that thing. It is actually remarkably rare. Even as I write this article, I find myself thinking, “I really should call this parish family, to see how they are doing,” and “do I need to get anything from the store on my way home from work?” When I’m eating dinner, I think, “I should write an email to my aunt,” but while I write that email, I think “I really need to clean the apartment.” In short, I never really focus on what I’m doing when I’m doing it. I’m not “fully present” for dinner, or the email. I wind up not really enjoying what I’m doing, or giving it the attention it deserves. The email is shorter, the relationship diminished, because I am not present. According to CREDO – the clergy wellness conference organization – mindfulness is an essential component to mental and spiritual health. And, based on my recent experience, I would say, physical health as well.

Had the other guy really focused on the trail, he would have seen me passing him, and not have hit me. But, how might being really present affect my life? I had been present earlier, when I was enjoying the ride – but I had let fretting over preparations and cleaning distract me. I was rushing, no longer enjoying the ride. No longer thanking God for the beauty of the day and the blessing of time to enjoy it.

We are entering summer, a season usually marked by vacations, or staycations, and efforts to “get away from it all.” My hope for all of you is that you may be fully present wherever you are, and experience all that each moment has to offer.

Michelle+